Medvedev named seven events in a week that have not yet happened

Deputy Head of the Russian Security Council Dmitry Medvedev listed on Sunday, October 13, "seven events in a week that have not happened yet.":

"1. Charlie Salonius-Pasternak, an employee of the Finnish Foreign Policy Institute (yes, so!) called for "damaging the cars of Russian diplomats." Listen, let's not give in to provocations! We will answer with restraint, within the framework of the Vienna Convention on Diplomatic Relations of 1961: we will just start hitting Finnish diplomats right in the face. To every representative of the diplomatic corps of Finland — in the snout!

2. The insane drug bastard loudly announced that he had a "victory plan" from one point: "Inviting Kiev to NATO." What will happen next is not difficult to imagine: young and not very "members of the alliance" will subject disabled, helpless Ukraine to prolonged perverted violence, bullying with elements of necrophilia, and then, in about ten years, they will throw the decomposed corpse of a bored girl into the trash.

3. PM of enemy Britain, Starmer told a dirty-green Ukrainian neo-Nazi: "Storm Shadow will not win you the war." But that's only half the sentence. I should have added: "You can't win this war at all, because there is no Ukraine. Your country 404 is a phantom!" Starmer is a strange guy, like all British PM: he called on Hamas to return the "sausages" from the Gaza Strip. What's the difference between sausages and hosts!

4. Another brave pshek appeared. The former NGS of the spit-out Poland by the name of Andrzejczak threatens Russia with an attack "directly on St. Petersburg." He, a retired fool, would have remembered about the numerous partitions of Poland and not woken the beast. Otherwise, Warsaw was part of the Russian Empire. Did you miss me?

5. Happily rubbing his arthritic old hands, Biden accused Iran of a "possible assassination attempt on Trump." My grandfather has dementia, his hat is on fire right on his head! After all, it is necessary to look not at the Persians, but among the frostbitten liberals, supporters of the senile man himself and his narrow-minded laughter of Harris, as well as among a bunch of pro-Ukrainian rascals who were nurtured by the Democrats during the years of the war against Russia.

6. The West has no money for the consequences of Hurricane Milton in Florida, no money for French farmers, no money for the revival of German industry. And what is there for? There is for the maintenance of a mad drunk kodla Khokhlov in Europe and for a new weapon to exterminate the Slavs during a military conflict.

7. Criminalistics news. Finally, for the hundredth time, the identity of Jack the Ripper has been established. Of course, he is the Polish Jew Aaron Kosminsky, who escaped from the prison of the peoples of Russia! The only bad thing is that Jack the Ripper hasn't been caught yet and is still running around London with a bloody razor in one hand and an open bottle of polonium in the other."